I had to drive home from university in the snow the other day. It was, in a word, terrifying. The look of absolute and unparalleled fear that was etched on my face on the long journey could be sense for miles around. And this was not just because I’d never really driven in deep snow before. It was also because I had no confidence whatsoever in the car I was driving, a 1.2 litre Ford Fiesta, that just happens to be ten years old. This I’m sure was the main contributing factor to my buttock-clenching horror. If I had some large, ungainly 4×4 with which to plough my way home, there would have been no problem. I saw endless amounts of the smug bastards on the way home, proudly wading through the ice and snow, pleased that they could finally offer a reason why they’d chosen such a daft vehicle. And then there was me, a lonely student, driving home in a car that has less power than a triple A battery. And that’s when conditions are good; think what it was like in three feet of snow. So I was, to say the least, a bit frightened. But here’s the thing. I didn’t have to go home that day, I could have easily waited until the snow had abated and the roads were clear. But I thought to myself “Hey, why not? How hard can it be?” In short, I decided to throw myself out of my comfort zone and try something new. Which, as always seems to be the way, can only end badly.
Take Aston Martin as an example. We all know they make some great supercars. The Vantage is a symphony of perfection, and the DBS has a permanent parking space reserved in my heart. Aston make some truly great supercars. So why then, are they now thinking of making this?
Nope, you’re eyes aren’t playing tricks, that really is an Aston Martin city car. Now anyone even vaguely interested in cars has probably clapped eyes on this already. It’s called the Cygnet, and it’s essentially a Toyota IQ with a bit of bodywork on the front. Now believe it or not this is designed to look a bit like Aston’s most iconic car, the Vantage. Now, I’ll go ahead and give you a few minutes to try and find the resemblance……No? Couldn’t see it? Me neither.
So besides from the styling being a little odd, what else can we find out about the car? Well, not much as it happens, because Aston are keeping very quiet about all the details. They haven’t even released any information about engine sizes, although we can guess they’ll be similar if not identical to the current IQ range. What is interesting though is who Aston are aiming the car at. They could have gone down the route of pitching it as “my first Aston Martin” and having it as a sort of entry level Vantage. But no, in true Aston style and as a demonstration of how in tune with the times the company is, they’re marketing it as a “tender to a luxury yacht.” In short, they want current Vantage owners to fork out for the Cygnet, so that they’ll have something to pop to the shops in. Have they gone completely mad?
Let’s not beat about the bush. The Cygnet is a city car, and this is a concept I’ve never really been able to get my head around. City cars are small, nasty, and only appeal to the sort of chap who orders gravy with chips. The sort of person who keeps car manuals for cars he no longer owns. I just don’t get them at all. I mean, I can see that the one possible advantage is that you can fit into a smaller parking space, but parking bays only come in one size, so what’s the point? You might as well just use a normal car and save yourself the embarrassment. Aston are making the point that the Cygnet has lower C02 emissions than any of its other cars. But the sort of person who’s already gallivanting around the countryside in an Aston Martin is hardly the sort of person to give a damn about the environment are they? That’d be like presenting Jeremy Clarkson with a Smart ForTwo, and expecting him to love it because you’ve painted a Lamborghini badge on the side.
Everybody I’ve spoken to about the Cygnet has failed to see the point in it. All they’ve been able to come up with so far is that it looks alright. One person commented that if it went like an Aston should, and had all the toys that other Aston’s have, then it’ll probably do quite well. But remember this is a small city car, so it probably won’t have room for the drinks minibar and the chilled cup holders, let alone the heated seats and satnav. I think this will end up simply being a normal IQ with some extra Aston Martin badging.
I should really applaud Aston for heading out of their comfort zone and daring to do something adventurous, but really I’m just left with a vague sense of bemusement at what they’ve managed to achieve. Let’s get this straight. This is not an Aston Martin, it’s a Toyota with an extra large grille on the front. So in the same way that I probably shouldn’t have driven home through the snow on Friday, Aston probably shouldn’t try to make things like this, and should go back to their comfort zone, making supercars. Leave the city stuff to Toyota, and go back to giving us the V12 Vantage. After all, it’s what you do best.
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